Sunday, May 24, 2009

Bio

For Sieve and the Sand, I had to create a "bio" for myself. Translated, that means make up complete, laughable nonsense. I did, but it's not posted up there yet, so I decided to post it here cause I thought it was a decent attempt a humor.

After a brief stint with a traveling troupe of gypsies known as “The Lollygaggers” across many regions of Russia and Greenland, BeigHartman thought it best to obtain a formal education. His studies at Tulane lasted three months before tree nymphs obligated him to pursue other aspirations in the Wyoming wilderness. Armed with a dreidel and taxidermy of his pet hamster, BeigHartman taught himself to read and write. Through careful study of geysers, he conceived what is commonly known as “The Harlem Shake” and “Crip Walk”. Shortly thereafter, BeigHartman exiled himself to Columbia, but due to extended litigations with international customs, left upon discovering that Columbia coffee has multifaceted usages. Some scholars as well as many prestigious quantum physicists have posited that BeigHartman lives to write, but this is blatantly false. In fact, the only reason he writes is because he procrastinates far too much to do anything else. To reach BeigHartman write to BeigHartman at sieveandsand.com

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